50 indispensable phrases to help you communicate with your child

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The words and phrases which we say to our children are of huge significance to their upbringing. When they test our patience, we can sometimes fall into the trap of using very negative expressions which don’t help with their development or behaviour in any way.

Here are some great ideas for banishing these negative phrases from your vocabulary and replacing them only with more positive ones. It’s surprisingly easy to reformulate your thoughts into something your child will understand without feeling hurt. We’re certain that you’ll be amazed at how much a negative situation can be turned around when you make use of these ideas.

Don’t say: Don’t say: “Stop shouting!“
Say instead: ”Speak a bit more quietly, please“

Don’t say: “Don’t eat so fast!”
Say instead: ”Remember to chew your food up well“

Don’t say: ”It’s a total mess in here again…“
Say instead: “Clean up in here a little, please”

Don’t say: “Hurry up!“
Say instead: ”It’s time to go now. Say goodbye!”

Don’t say: “Get back here!”
Say instead: ”Come down from there, please“

Don’t say: ”You’re going to hurt yourself!“
Say instead: “Be careful!”

Don’t say: ”You’ll end up crying!“
Say instead: ”Think about the consequences“

Don’t say: “You’ll slip and fall over!”
Say instead: “Watch your step!“

Don’t say: ”You’re going to get soaked!”
Say instead: “Take the umbrella/put on your boots”

Don’t say: “Stop fussing!“
Say instead: ”There’s still plenty of time“

Don’t say: “Don’t run!”
Say instead: ”Walk slowly“

Don’t say: ”Shut up!”
Say instead: “Listen to me, please”

Don’t say: “Get moving!“
Say instead: ”It’s time to stop now, we have to go”

Don’t say: “How many times do I have to tell you?”
Say instead: ”Please do what I asked you to“

Don’t say: ”Are you dumb? Why don’t you understand!“
Say instead: “Calm down and let’s work this problem out together”

Don’t say: ”Are you deaf?“
Say instead: ”Listen to me, please“

Don’t say: “What are you, blind?”
Say instead: “Pay attention, please“

Don’t say: ”You should be ashamed of yourself!”
Say instead: “Think about your behaviour”

Don’t say: ”How dare you!“
Say instead: ”We don’t talk like that in our family“

Don’t say: “I told you this would happen!”
Say instead: ”You can learn a lesson from your mistakes“

Don’t say: ”You’ll never do it!”
Say instead: “Try and see if you can do it”

Don’t say: “How should I know?“
Say instead: ”Let’s think about it together”

Don’t say: “What are you talking about?”
Say instead: “Explain that to me one more time“

Don’t say: ”You got it wrong!“
Say instead: “It’s great that you had that idea”

Don’t say: ”I said no!“
Say instead: ”Sorry but I won’t change my mind about this”

Don’t say: “Why? Because I said so!”
Say instead: “Because you’re parents took this decision“

Don’t say: ”No sweets for you!”
Say instead: “You can have this later for dessert”

Don’t say: “If only you knew how sick I am of you!“
Say instead: ”I don’t want to discuss this with you know, lets talk about it later“

Don’t say: “Do you know what time it is!?”
Say instead: ”It’s late. Time to go to bed“

Don’t say: ”Don’t you think I’m tired as well?“
Say instead: “I know, we’re all tired”

Don’t say: “You’re going to get a smack in a moment!“
Say instead: ”I’m so disappointed that I might say or do something I’ll later regret”

Don’t say: “Stop bothering me!”
Say instead: ”Sorry, I’m busy right now“

Don’t say: ”Are you crazy?“
Say instead: “Think about what you’re saying”

Don’t say: ”That’s too expensive!“
Say instead: ”We’re buying something else today”

Don’t say: “Turn off the TV right now!”
Say instead: “The TV has been used to much today“

Don’t say: ”Go and do your homework!”
Say instead: “Do your work now and you can play later”

Don’t say: “I never behaved as badly as you when I was child“
Say instead: ”You can make mistakes, but you have to learn from them“

Don’t say: “This never happened to me!”
Say instead: ”I had a different childhood“

Don’t say: ”Stop crying over nothing!”
Say instead: “Let’s think about how to deal with it together”

Don’t say: “Get a hold of yourself!“
Say instead: ”I know this is important to you. Calm down and we’ll think about this together”

Don’t say: “Watch where you’re going!”
Say instead: “Be careful to watch your step“

Don’t say: ”No one will be friends with you!“
Say instead: “Think about what this means for your friend”

Don’t say: ”Don’t try to trick me!“
Say instead: ”It’s very important to tell the truth.“

Don’t say: “You’ve got nothing to be proud of!”
Say instead: “Are you sure you should be proud of this?“

Don’t say: ”Do you want to get sick?!”
Say instead: “If you get sick, you won’t be able to do anything fun”

Don’t say: ”I’ll tell your father everything!“
Say instead: ”I’ll have to tell your father everything. He won’t be pleased“

Don’t say: “You’re not as good as the other children”
Say instead: ”I love you, but sometimes your behaviour upsets me“

Don’t say: ”Why is it so hard for you to understand?”
Say instead: “Tell me what you don’t understand here”

Don’t say: “We’ll sort this out when we get home…“
Say instead: ”I’m going to have to punish you for this later.”

Don’t say: “You ungrateful little thing!”
Say instead: “We really try to make you happy. There’s no need to get so upset”

We’d love to hear your views on this…

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