Over the past few years I have become a father to not just one, but three daughters in quick succession. The idea soon occurred to me to write a guide to help me cope with this unusual, but at the same time wonderful situation. Take a look, maybe you can think of something to add.
- Everything your oldest daughter tells you is important. Everything your second daughter tells you is important. And the same goes for your youngest one as well. Even if it’s completely incomprehensible, it’s important. Take the time to listen.
- All little girls are pretty. Remember to tell them this a zillion times a day.
- Forget about raising your voice. But if you do accidentally lose your temper, apologise.
- If she asks for a new toy, suggest that she give away two old ones to her little sister.
- Every little girl is a princess. Sounds like a cliché? Not at all! You’ll see. But this means you have to bring her up to behave like one, as well, and that’s no simple task. This incredible gift comes with great responsibility.
- If your oldest daughter phones unexpectedly, don’t just assume she needs money. Maybe she just needs to talk.
- Hugs are important. She’s your little girl, and the world’s a scary place. And she’ll still be your little girl when she’s 22. Showing your daughter tenderness and affection is the most important thing you’ll ever have to do.
- If she wants to help around the house, give her a chance. You’ll never find a more diligent and conscientious little helper.
- She should get the chance to do certain activities just with you, on a regular basis, rather than with your partner, whether it’s cooking together, sweeping up leaves in the garden, or just combing her hair after she’s had a bath.
- A girl should always feel that her father is there to protect her. And this starts from the moment she first quarrels with the boy at kindergarten and continues right up to the time when she asks you to pick her up after her first date with him a decade later — and beyond.
- Sick of the mess in her bedroom? Start tidying up together, but let her do most of the work.
- If you have to go to the hospital, reassure her that she doesn’t need to be scared of the doctor. And remember to point out that some of the most talented doctors in the world were once little girls just like her.
- Every daughter should get the chance to go on a trip somewhere just with her father. And it should be her choice where you go together.
- Don’t ever tell her that her mother was wrong about something. You’re both wrong.
- Love to watch sport in the evening after a hard day’s work? Then give her the chance to watch it with you. Watching TV should be family time rather than ’me time’. Plus, you won’t ever have to buy a TV for her bedroom.
- All daughters have the right to cry on your shoulder when they need to — even if that means you’ll end up with makeup stains all over your best shirt. If your daughter doesn’t feel she can’t rely on you in this way, then something is seriously wrong.
- Develop your own fairy tale, long enough to be divided into several parts, and full of different characters. Memorise it, tell it to her often — I guarantee you’ll thank me for this one.
- Your daughter is not made of glass. Let her jump on that trampoline and run around. If she scratches her knee, it’s not the end of the world.
- There are certain things which require careful explanation. Remind her that unless she holds your hand when crossing the road, no one will notice that this beautiful girl is your daughter. Warn her that the cake won’t taste very nice if she climbs in the oven with it.
- The most important thing is that she tries. If she’s trying really hard to learn how to paint, but hasn’t quite got there yet, give her the praise she deserves for making the effort — and then point her in the right direction.
- Weather permitting, let your little girl wear what she wants — even if it looks ridiculous.
- Don’t even bother trying to help a four-year-old put on fifteen items of clothing all at once when she wants to dress up. A girl knows best. But when it’s something complex like a buckle or a clasp, you are permitted to intervene.
- Never, ever reveal the secrets which she shared with you — even if she already told everyone herself.
- Who told you that you’re only allowed to give flowers to your partner?
Author: Oleg Konevskikh
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