The different styles of Attachment in Relationships, what is your Style?


You might not know the fact but your interpersonal attachment style will be putting a huge effect on your relationship.  For the readers, it is to be mentioned that there are four adult attachment styles including the Secure, Anxious-Preoccupied, Dismissive-Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant. When you get into any relationship, your attachment style keeps on changing with the passage of time. Let’s catch the four main relationship attachment styles and its major traits: Learning about these attachment styles, you can learn about your relationship style as well.

Secure Attachment Style:

Doctor ASKY / Relationships

In the secure attachment style, the partners are hence capable of conveying emotions appropriately and constructively. They are also having the ability of bending, and receiving healthy expressions of intimacy as well as drawing healthy, appropriate and reasonable boundaries when required. They are secure with a partner and without a partner as well. They are always tending to put together the positive view of relationships and personal interactions. They are also capable of grieving, learning, and moving on.

Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment Style:

Doctor ASKY / Relationships

In the strong Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment Style they are much inclined to the impression to feel more nervous and less secure about relationships in general. They are much reluctant in giving the people the benefit of the doubt as well as the tendency for automatic negative thinking when interpreting others’ intentions, words, and actions. They might give the negative response when not provided with regular positive reinforcement. They are complete drama oriented.

Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment Style:

Doctor ASKY / Relationships

In the category of the strong Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment Style, the partners tend to be massive and highly self-directed and self-sufficient. They are independent behaviorally and emotionally being part of. They also consider out to avoid the true intimacy which makes one vulnerable. They are in the want of getting free of both physically and emotionally. They have many commitment issues as well. They would act upon to be passive-aggressive and/or narcissistic.

Fearful-Avoidant Attachment Style:

Doctor ASKY / Relationships

Those with the strong Fearful-Avoidant Attachment Style the partners tend to be on the whole associated with highly challenging life experiences such as grief, as well as abandonment and abuse. They hence resist away from the intimacy. They have an inner conflict.  They also struggle with having confidence in and relying on others. They are much suspicious of others’ intentions, words, and actions. As in comparison with the Dismissive-Avoidant Style, they push people away and have few of the genuinely close relationships.

Which Relationship Attachment Style is Best?

Doctor ASKY / Relationships

Among all the 4 attachment styles, secure attachment style tends to act as strong partners and this style is one of the most successful in the relationships. They have the self-awareness as well as mutual willingness to grow, and courage to seek professional help when needed. In the absence of these traits, the secure attachment style generates issues of incompatibility in a relationship.

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