Sometimes it so happens that we reach a stage in our life where no one seems to understand our emotions. No one else is able to decipher besides us what we are really going through. And it sucks! Even our family and closest friends seem like total strangers who you are meeting for the first time. They push you to your last limits and when they cross the line is the time you cut them for some time to regain what you have lost in between. Sometimes it happens that family doesn’t seem family anymore. You feel like you are not bound by blood and they just pick you from the steps of a church and decided to take you in and now are greatly regretting their decision. And in just a blink of the eye, blooming relationships turn into toxic ones.
There are times where it is totally okay to cut family out without feeling regrettable because you have every right of living your own life.
1) Mental disturbance:
Some families are such that they expect you to do only what they want from you. They can create big drama out of small issues and start getting on your nerves. Even if you are steel-nerved they will find ways to catch you, no matter what. Something breaks inside when one reaches this stage. It is something implausible to accept that you cannot do what you actually want to do with your life. Students, a divorced daughter, an unemployed son always are seen under the critic’s eye. It is sad to see one student who is studying medical having paintbrushes scattered on his table. The divorced daughter needs sympathy and support but all she gets is dirty glances and taunts. The family is convinced that somehow, she was the one at fault because they found her the flawless man. And then the dilemma of the jobless son, they do not know that when they forced him to study engineering, he used to write articles for a website. It is best that we avoid family in such situations because it leads to certain mental disorders. For example, Borderline Personality Disorder, also known as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD), is a long-term pattern of abnormal behavior characterized by unstable relationships with other people, an unstable sense of self and unstable emotions.
2) When they cross the invisible line:
Sometimes family members act as if you are something they bought from the market for personal use. You have to make them realize that you are not a materialistic thing but a living being who has his own life and the right to be selfish to some extent. It is only wise to distance yourselves from them when they start acting all dominating and making you believe that you are worthless even when you are at rock bottom. They will only realize what surrealistic thing they had in possession when they will lose it. They will come around themselves and meanwhile you will get the time to pull yourself together.
3) Continuous and unbearable nagging:
Parents always think of their children as toddlers even if they cross a century. They try to guide and protect at every turn and most of the time this constant nagging, over-protectiveness, and possessiveness becomes suffocating. It’s you who have to make them realize that you are now mature enough to differentiate between what’s right and wrong and make sensible decisions for yourself. They try to go all dominating on you and it’s time you make them realize that you are no more the crawling baby whose care they have to take at every single step. Parents really never come around to this idea but with passing time learn to adjust with our ‘maturity’. Sometimes instead of things turning better, the relationships get toxic and that’s where we have to be the bigger person and build pillars to give support to a going-down-the-drain relationship!
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